rip someone a new one (2025)

Hi, I was reading Adam Kay's Twas the Nightshift Before Christmas and couldn't get the joke about "rip ... a new one":

(Children singing... a little too noisy in a hospital...The doctor (author) was watching...)
My bleep goes off and I feel strangely reluctant to head back to labour ward. A man walks past me, leans over the railings and says to his partner, "Good advert for contraception." I'm about to tut pointedly when a patient from yesterday gestures at me and says, "You should try having this bloke rip you a new one."

Thank you in advance.
CJ

It didn’t mean anything to me, but I found an explanation here: What does rip a new one mean? OnlineSlangDictionary.com

Thank you. But it doesn't make any sense.

lingobingo said:

It didn’t mean anything to me, but I found an explanation here: What does rip a new one mean? OnlineSlangDictionary.com

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It is a hyperbole of a hyperbole.

The first hyperbole is "ream one's asshole" or "ream his butt".

ream his ass

ream (one's) ass
1. vulgar slang To aggressively and angrily rebuke, criticize, or chastise someone, especially for mistake or wrongdoing.

The hyperbole of that phrase is basically to create another asshole, or "rip him a new one".

Thank you.

Packard said:

It is a hyperbole of a hyperbole.

The first hyperbole is "ream one's asshole" or "ream his butt".

ream his ass

ream (one's) ass
1. vulgar slang To aggressively and angrily rebuke, criticize, or chastise someone, especially for mistake or wrongdoing.

The hyperbole of that phrase is basically to create another asshole, or "rip him a new one".

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Sylvia_scj said:

Thank you.

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Although I presented it as a "fact" it is really just my opinion. I believe it to be correct though.

Packard said:

Although I presented it as a "fact" it is really just my opinion. I believe it to be correct though.

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The author was an obstetrician, so do you think it has something to do with delivering a baby?

Sylvia_scj said:

The author was an obstetrician, so do you think it has something to do with delivering a baby?

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No, no, no, no. It has nothing to do with real anatomy at all.

Packard said:

No, no, no, no. It has nothing to do with real anatomy at all.

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I am confused. Will you explain in detail? Thank you.

lingobingo said:

This has nothing whatever to do with childbirth. Did you read the link in #2? The definition given is: to verbally attack someone.

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Did you read the context in #1? Usually, it does not, however, this entire conversation is about how unpleasant childbirth is (it acts as a "contraceptive"). The patient was not verbally abused by the doctor but the doctor did deliver her baby (possibly an episiotomy was involved). The joke is that she uses the idiom to refer to the literal, although exaggerated, situation.

lingobingo said:

(I also didn’t know the author was a comedian. )

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The title of the book is a joke.
A Visit from St. Nicholas - Wikipedia

"A Visit from St. Nicholas", more commonly known as "The Night Before Christmas" and "'Twas the Night Before Christmas" from its first line, is a poem first published anonymously in 1823 and later attributed to Clement Clarke Moore, who claimed authorship in 1837.

The poem has been called "arguably the best-known verses ever written by an American"[1] and is largely responsible for some of the conceptions of Santa Claus from the mid-nineteenth century to today. It has had a massive effect on the history of Christmas gift-giving.

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lingobingo said:

An American using the word bloke? Interesting… Perhaps the woman was a Brit.

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The British author has made a pun on an American poem for the title of his book. Perhaps you need a cup of coffee...

I was confused at first, too, but after having read all the discussion I'll summarize my understanding.

The doctor is listening to the children singing noisily. A man comes along with his wife/girlfriend and says the singing is a good argument for contraception, i.e. not having children (at all). A woman (patient) whose baby was delivered by the doctor the previous day points to the doctor and basically says, "If you think that's a good argument for not having children you should try having this doctor do to you what he did to me yesterday in the course of delivering my baby. Avoiding having that done to you is an even better argument for avoiding childbirth."

episiotomy
a surgical cut made at the opening of the vagina during childbirth, to aid a difficult delivery and prevent rupture of tissues.

Of course the doctor didn't "rip" it, but that's the wording of the common phrase (at least common where I live), and as said above, nearly always [99.9+%] figurative.